martes, octubre 24, 2006

life on mars

An extract from Shooting Stars, a comedy, written 2004

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Erica: Sometimes I wake up and I think that maybe I’m not actually human. I look human, but I’m not sure. Do you ever think that?

Lee Er - no.

Erica: My mum and dad aren’t very human. They just sit at home and watch telly all day. Like something isn’t working quite right. I’m not saying I’m a machine, but maybe they come from somewhere else. Like Sirius.

Lee: Sirius?

Erica: It’s a star. Quite a close one.

Lee: You think you come from Sirius.

Erica: There’s more aliens than people realise. Once you know what to look for you can spot them a mile away. They’re the ones in the shop who have no feelings. They have a way of treating people which is totally non-human. I’m not one of them. I think most of them come from the death star. Because I do care a little bit. But all the same. No-one understands my feelings. Ever. Which makes me think that maybe I am one of them. An alien. But a friendly alien. From somewhere like Sirius. I can’t be precise. It’s more an intuition than a fact. (Lee fidgets) You can watch the football again when I go.

Lee: What’s this got to do with Joey?

Erica: I’m trying to find someone. Someone who makes me feel like a human. I’m sure there’s one out there somewhere. I go out and search. Sometimes I think they could be a footballer. I thought it might be Joey. You were right about him. There’s something different.

Lee: You think Joey’s an alien?

Erica: In the end I decided he wasn’t. I read that article and all it talked about was all that sentimental stuff about your dad dying, and what a nice boy he is and how plucky, and I decided he was much too human to be an alien.

Lee: You decided.

Erica: We could have been two independent life-forms colliding by some kind of freaky chance in this little corner of the universe. That’s what I’m looking for. But we’re not. He’s just another footballer picking up another girl he fancied. That’s why we’re incompatible. You can tell him that.

Lee: I don’t know what to say.

Erica: Good.